i newspaper, January 4, 2024
(26 words) I can’t believe that subs are still using this refrain from a 1970s advert. Surely it is time to let the poor old thing rest in peace after 50 years. It wasn’t funny even at the time, and what can it possibly mean to younger readers?
Filling out a line with ellipses is amateur and I can’t see any need for it here.
Do you need ZSL (Zoological Society of London)? I don’t see why. London Zoo is perfectly adequate. If you know there are 14,000 animals, why do you need to count them? And ‘every one’ is singular so it should be ‘is counted’, not ‘are counted’.
In 26 words I would prefer not to see ‘count’ twice and ‘zoo’ three times.
This is how I would have done it (as it was a picture story showing half a dozen penguins I don’t think it is vital to use the word in the heading):
All present
and correct
IT’S time for the annual stocktake of London Zoo’s 14,000 or so residents, and keeper Jess counts the Humboldt penguins, which are native to South America. (26 words)